After
Goya
In
Goya’s drawings the line’s frenzied even when the content seems less than
disgusting
that girl dancing for example with or without the leering crowd the lightness of her feet and the movement in her shift dress float
almost but in his portraits the face emerges from crosshatching
as if the whole image were a rubbing taken of the face in which darker patches emerge under the pencil shading
regardless
of what the artist does which makes me think about portraits in general
or the way we look at people and let them impress themselves on us
this girl for example I’ve been trying to help out who responds not with friendliness–– call and response––
but with sullen anger & desire to compete and displace
so
great it seems is her fury that anyone should experience a happiness she
doesn’t know how
to make but only to spoil
so that skulking between the rose bushes and the house wall
are the deep shadows of her withholding
traps and booby traps then but how strange the way she impresses herself
on
my soft heart on my uncovered summer skin like a stamp––DECLINED––
all the old wounds rising to it through the blizzard of crosshatchings
27
March
Behold
and
behold says
the goldfinch
over
and over
though whether
he means himself
or the spring
is unclear
perhaps even
to himself
because what
is going on
is distension
morning shaping
up like an
inflatable
and
the harried
conscientious
I finds
itself enlarged
by what surrounds it––
frail
and absolutely
certain
margin of everything
that is
the morning case
that girl dancing for example with or without the leering crowd the lightness of her feet and the movement in her shift dress float
almost but in his portraits the face emerges from crosshatching
as if the whole image were a rubbing taken of the face in which darker patches emerge under the pencil shading
or the way we look at people and let them impress themselves on us
this girl for example I’ve been trying to help out who responds not with friendliness–– call and response––
but with sullen anger & desire to compete and displace
so that skulking between the rose bushes and the house wall
are the deep shadows of her withholding
traps and booby traps then but how strange the way she impresses herself
all the old wounds rising to it through the blizzard of crosshatchings
behold says
the goldfinch
over
and over
though whether
he means himself
or the spring
is unclear
perhaps even
to himself
because what
is going on
is distension
morning shaping
up like an
inflatable
conscientious
I finds
itself enlarged
by what surrounds it––
frail
and absolutely
certain
margin of everything
that is
the morning case
stars bloom and dazzle
they leap to the eye
mazy explosions
of odour
tangle
which surely no one
passerby
as you are we were
so you will be––
it’s the old promise
some of us learnt
and here we come hurrying
or slow
clothes which are like
new memories
how it is and how it
will be
